Younger and Older Friends!

Butterflies! Peaches! Etc.

(Swallowtail caterpillars on fennel! How many can you spot?)

Hi!

There are swallowtail butterflies in our yard and their caterpillars are in all stages of growth. We found fifteen of them on two small plants the other morning! Apparently they crawl far from their host plant to pupate, so I have some serious detective work if I want to see a chrysalis. Maybe Harriet will help me.

Watching the caterpillars has me thinking about intergenerational friendships. You too? ;-) How many friends do you have who are significantly older or younger than you? About a decade ago I heard a woman talk about how integral this is to our evolution as humans. I’ve since intentionally nurtured some really special relationships. Moms who are ahead of me in the work of raising humans. They can hear my experiences, and I feel genuinely, deeply seen and supported. Women who point out the important work of nutrition and body upkeep because of what they have experienced as they age. Women who will sit with me under a tree and laugh, or cry.

Women who have done activist work, who have marched and organized–these same women seemed heartbroken over a lot of the recent changes in our society’s laws and behaviors. I want to, and have, taken their hands and said, “We care! This generation cares and won’t give up. We want a world like you dreamed of for ourselves and our daughters. Don’t give up, maybe instead whisper us your secrets. Point a direction. We won’t let women, children, minorities, love be unspoken for. But we need you.”

I am trying to touch base with women who are older and seem wise, settled, strong, knowing. I am asking questions, attending meetings. I am showing up. And it’s making me feel less scared, less helpless, less numb. I'll report back.

To all of you, I am thankful for your companionship in this experience of life. I am thankful for each person who takes time to treat my daughter as a friend, and for those who are reading this right now. ;-)

Peace,

Ashley

(Speaking of intergenerational friendships. We went to visit my dear friend Stephanie in OKC, and I am so happy for Harriet to know her and be her friend too. We’ve been friends since childhood. XOXO)

Garden Update:

PEACHES! Peaches. Makes me think of that glorious John Prine song Spanish Pipedream . "

“Blow up your TV, throw away your paper
Go to the country, build you a home
Plant a little garden, eat a lot of peaches
Try an find Jesus on your own ”

Right. So we got some peaches from our tree. We got one last year. It’ll probably be eight this year. Miracle in my mouth.

In other garden news, it’s hot as F out and dry. Not the best growing year. I think some of our plants may have succumbed to scale. I’m still figuring out what exactly that is and what I have to do about it. I’m trying to let go of my dreams for those plants.

Cucumbers abound.

Surprise lilies literally surprised us this morning. Ha!

Please send rain.

(Wow little spider! Look at what you made!!!!!)

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Making:

I did interior design work in my former life as a co-owner of Retro Den. I still have two clients I am working with. Is it cheating that they are both two of my closest friends? Yes.

One is Stephanie, from the photo above. We are working on her dining room and bedroom. They had a gorgeous painting done by Cyterica Flores (scroll to admire!). We are moving their curtains up, hanging Cyterica’s painting, hanging some family portraits, and plotting some final styling—then this room is done! I love how this room is feeling.

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Recent reading:

My beautiful, ever-encouraging friend Cassie started a newsletter…Cassie in Your Inbox. She says nice things about me. So obviously you’ll want to read that post. She is also a very creative, stylish, incredibly kind person of such depth and joy. Thanks for being nice Cassie.

I’m in the middle of some books, so no reviews this week.

Yesterday Harriet read TO HERSELF Ivy and the Lonely Raincloud. I asked her what reading felt like, and she said, “Reading feels like freedom.” I don’t remember what I initially felt about reading, but it feels so essential right now. It feels like freedom to me too–freedom to learn, grow, understand other experiences, live in made up worlds, become a better citizen and neighbor and mom and friend.

What does reading feel like to you?

Do you remember what you thought about it when you were learning?

What are you reading right now?

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(I wish I could send everyone flowers. I was thinking I may start an effort to deliver a bouquet to every person on my street. Would that weird my neighbors out? :-) )